Monday, March 3, 2014

The Best Job In the World

I have the best job in the world.

In this house, I am the one who dumps and rinses the sick pails.

I clean up the dog poop left in the garage by the elderly and somewhat incontinent old hound; she can't always wait for us to let her out.

I'm the hairball-cleaner-upper and the toilet-scrubber, as well as the lucky one who plunges them when necessary.

If there are gooey globs of hair in the drain, or slimy gobs of moldy food plugging the dishwasher, its my job to evacuate them.  The science lab in my refrigerator is my responsibility, as well.

My eye doctor laughed when I visited him with a raging infection, the result of manure juice splashing in my eye while cleaning a cow's stall. He said that was a first, for him.

There are days when I find myself shoulder-deep in the back end of a foaling mare, standing in fresh manure, while an ice storm rages outside and the vet inches his way to our aid.

I'm present for the messy breedings and births and deaths and the often grody doctoring of livestock, often in closer proximity to the action than most normal people would ever allow themselves to be.  As for the  inevitable deaths, some are messy, some are not, but I still cry over every one... then perform the clean up and disposal... and then, cry again.

Merchant marines have nothing on me when it comes to swearing over a frozen hose or broken fence or dead battery... not a skill I'm proud of, but sometimes, something's gotta give.

The good news is the next sentence after the curse is usually a prayer of gratitude. As in, "Sorry for that one, Lord... I know You will help me out here, You always do."  And then, He does.  Not always in the way I hope He will help, and not always in my time frame, but in His way and in His time, and it always works out for the best.

If something needs cleaning or painting or doctoring or praying or tending, I'm your girl; especially if  the job requires a strong stomach, extra dose of fortitude or wildy-irrational-yet-steadfast faith.

I have the best job in the world.